Code orange

I realized the other day that I unwittingly quoted a Rod Stewart song to someone in a text. It wasn't just a random lyric either. I quoted the title of the song. I'm pretty embarrassed about this fact. I am that girl. For the record, I was completely sincere when I said "You're in my heart." It wasn't until later when I was thinking of that phrase that I started to hear Rod Stewart chiming in with "you're in my soul. you're in my breath should I grow old." (What does that last line even mean?) When someone returns your belongings does it mean you've broken up? Is it really breaking up if you were never really going out to begin with? If I was told "look, you and I, we will never work." I would at least know where I stood, and where to stand. I could move on from that. Does this make me a control freak? Or isn't that just fair? This has happened before, and it took 7 years to be told where I stood and by then it was too late. A person either wants another person in their life or they don't. Maybe I will make up one of those color charts like they use for the terror alert. Do you like me - yellow, orange or red. Even that isn't very clear. Isn't keeping things open ended just leading someone on? I tend to lap up little crumbs of attention like they are giant scoops of icecream raining from the sky. So unless a guy wants to share an icecream sundae with me then he should stop giving me little sweet hints and smiles. This seems like an awful alternative, because I love icecream. I was asked today to think about what I wanted. I know what I want. What does he want? I have no idea. But that wasn't the question.

This American Life: Break Up episode.

For the record... I heard that Rod Stewart song I quoted at the little corner market tonight. It put a big stupid grin on my face, at least I amuse myself sometimes.